April 2019: The Moments In Between

I take hundreds of photos every month, and most of them don’t get shared with anyone, let alone online. And yet the moments in time that those photos capture are just as important a part of our story as the other images that I do choose to share.

I originally created this blog as a way of documenting our lives, a way of watching the girls grow into who they’re going to be and a way of remembering who they once were. It’s something I want them to be able to look back on as they get older, because memories fade but (digital) photographs don’t.

It’s easy (and tempting) to only focus on sharing the fun bits, the memorable parts, the highlights and the celebrations. But I’m learning more and more as I continue through this crazy journey of motherhood that it’s really important to me that I capture the ordinary, everyday times that we spend together as well. The bits of the jigsaw that fill in the gaps to complete the picture. The tantalising glimpses into who our girls are becoming.

The chaos, the calm and all the moments in between.

This monthly feature – The Moments In Between – is a space for me to share all of those magical bits that would otherwise just stay in a folder on my laptop, never to see the light of day.

APRIL

April was a month full of paradoxes.  Stressful and blissful.  Apart and together.  Routine and extraordinary.  Ups and downs.  Blank and creative.  Exhausted and energised.  Boredom and frustration and motivation and inspiration.  Head and heart.  Limits and freedom.  Busy and relaxed.  Tears and smiles.  Empty and full.  I still marvel that all of these things can exist at the same time and that it’s up to us to decide whether they’re going to conflict with each other or exist in harmony together.  I’ve tried to choose the latter and I think I mostly managed it.

I’m writing this post, my favourite one of the month to put together, a week later than I usually do because, well, life.  Giving myself grace and knowing that I don’t have to beat myself up for not quite sticking to a self-imposed schedule that no-one knows about apart from me anyway.  I’m learning.

I have so many photos to share from our trip to Cornwall.  So many special, ordinary moments.  It was a break that we all desperately needed to allow us to recharge, to reconnect with ourselves and to rediscover what makes us tick as a family.  It was wonderful.  And challenging.  Wonderfully challenging.  And I wouldn’t have had it any other way.  We got home and launched straight into more chaos as all the work on rebuilding our kitchen started.  It was finally finished  a few days ago, behind schedule (of course), but done.  I can cook proper meals and wash up in an actual sink and it feels good to get back to something resembling our version of normal.

I love every single photo in this collection, just as I always do.  And there are definitely some new favourites that I’m absolutely determined to print out and get up in frames on the walls.  They tell such a story. Our story. I can remember every detail, every movement, every gesture and expression, from every image.  They’re so much more than just memories.  They all have a meaning for me far deeper than the surface level of what you see.

Every single one brings back feelings and thoughts and moments I want to remember.

Every single one speaks to me in so many ways.

Every single one is a piece of our jigsaw.

This is us.

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